- Honest Officer
- 13 years ago
- 1344 views
Brian Sensitivity
A few years ago I was in the Rajajinagar RTO. My license had expired while I was out of the country and it was the old paper license anyway - Karnataka had switched to the plastic cards and I needed to get a new one.
As usual I was accosted by hundreds of touts and I resisted them and went ahead and stood in line. After a couple of hours a guy came to me and said he would get my renewal done in a jiffy without me having to take the written test, and I succumbed.
He advised me on what needs to be done, where to pay which fee and where to go for a photo etc. I did all that. Then when the time came to fill out the form he advised me to say that under education I should say I was a 'seventh standard failed'! I laughed out aloud and said that is stupid. He grimly warned me that either I do it and get my license quickly or wait forever and take the written test. The greater fool that I am, I had already paid this fool, and thought 'what the heck, let me see what happens!'
I took my form over to the official that the tout had pointed out - I assumed he had arranged for the official to just pass the paper on. But to my chagrine and utter embarassment, the guy looks at my '7th standard failed!' claim and says 'What is this nonsense, Mr. Vasan?! How can you say you are a 7th Standard failed?! Anyone can see you are much better educated! Please stop lying, correct this form and bring it back to me. I will show you where to take the written test.'
That was that. I came out and told my idiot tout to get lost. He gladly walked away saying it was my problem now.
I took the test. It was quite easy. I went on to the next stage of 'driving test'. They gave me an appointment to come back after a day or two. I was told to ride my scooter down the street and turn and come back. I rode down the street, stopped and carefully made a u turn and came back.
The driving test inspector looked at me with contempt and said 'did I tell you to stop?' I said no - he had not. Then he said 'This is why you have a problem getting a license. You have no 'brain sensitivity'! Actually it is funnier in kannada 'Nodi - naan nimage, alli hogi nillisi, antha hayliddana? Illa! aadroo neevu nillisidri! nimage 'brain sensitivity' kammi!'
Again I had to laugh and say 'yes, you are right. I have very little 'brain sensitivity'! Shall I come back next week again?'. He grinned at me, surprised that I had not gotten angry or offered him money. He just laughed at me and said - 'nevermind' ('hoogali bidi!') and gave me the license.
I very well could have not paid the bribe in the first place which was a waste anyway! But given my poor 'brain sensitivity' what else do you expect?!
By the way - I have another license story which might be funnier than the story at the Rajajinagar RTO. Again no bribes involved. Only my own goofiness, luck (and charm - I would like to fool my self).
When I went to get my motor cycle license in the San Francisco city department of motor vehicles, I again goofed up the driving test by putting my feet down for support while making a turn when the test called for me not to do so. By the way, I had already been scolded by the official for practicing in the test area where we are not supposed to! Bad signs!
Then, of all the crazy things the inspector asks me about hand signals. I had no clue. I completely goofed it - even used the wrong hand to give fake signals I had made up!
I quietly offered to come back again next week. The lady, who was the inspector, looked at me with pity and gave me a tired look and said, 'how long have you been riding motor cycles?' 'Oh for about 15 years at least' I said. And I added that I had been riding on a temporary license for a couple of months in the city and on the freeways and as she could see, I had come there riding easily, negotiating the traffic. With a resigned expression she said 'it's OK, no need to come again, go get your license!'
Am I a lucky fool? Or a Charming fool? Who knows - fool, for sure I am! With no 'brain sensitivity'! After all, I paid a bribe to avoid the test, but took the test anyway! Is there a greater fool than that?!